The past is warm and familiar. I carry it with me, take it out of my pocket, view my face in its reflection. I see every bump, every line, every swipe of mascara that missed its mark.
Nathan is on the waiting list for two medical schools. Because he only applied to six schools, and so late in the cycle, the only spots available were wait-listed. I long, I ache, I pray for the call that tells us we are moving, that a spot it open. My chest tightens with excitement when I think about it. I think we will be moving to Maryland, just outside of DC. I have seen signs everywhere. Three separate vehicles with Air Force bumper stickers, and the name Bethasda, MD, has been popping up everywhere. Then, I saw a Maryland license plate yesterday.
Oh, Lord, oh, Lord.
Like I said, the past is a guarantee. What is done is done. In the future, I write ahead of myself, painting my face and future in a hazy cloud.
A huge bonus of Nathan being in school is that I will not be working. I long to focus just on my son. As it is, by the time Thursday rolls around, I am incredibly annoyed with him because I am so tired. It takes me the whole weekend to relax.
